I hate that term. It suggests that any other way of getting birth is not 'natural'. The reality is that growing and having a baby is natural. The end.
Thankfully, we are in a world where technology means that we can have safe births for all. No matter what happens before conception, no matter what happens before or during labour. It is still possible, in the vast majority of cases, to ensure a completely safe delivery.
What winds me up though, is the massive amounts of negativity around birth. I talk a lot about guilt, and there seems to be so much guilt around the type of birth that people have. The way that some women feel as if their bodies didn't quite work the way they were supposed to, or the distress they felt during labour, or the regret that things could have been different, or the fear of what could go wrong. It's almost a bit embarrassing to say, 'yeah, it was a great day - I'm really proud of myself'.
Thankfully, we are in a world where technology means that we can have safe births for all. No matter what happens before conception, no matter what happens before or during labour. It is still possible, in the vast majority of cases, to ensure a completely safe delivery.
What winds me up though, is the massive amounts of negativity around birth. I talk a lot about guilt, and there seems to be so much guilt around the type of birth that people have. The way that some women feel as if their bodies didn't quite work the way they were supposed to, or the distress they felt during labour, or the regret that things could have been different, or the fear of what could go wrong. It's almost a bit embarrassing to say, 'yeah, it was a great day - I'm really proud of myself'. 'A society that places a low value on mothers and the process of birth will suffer an array of negative repercussions for doing so' (Ina May Gaskin)We all know that giving birth is not an easy task, no matter what path it takes. We will feel, what we describe as pain. And everyone will experience and react to that differently. Getting through that could be an epic achievement for some. And for some, the after effects could be a reminder of the power needed to get through such an immense experience. For some, the choices around pain relief will be invaluable. We have options as women to decide how to manage birthing and we should be proud of the decisions we make. For others, there are doctors who will assist in bringing our babies into the world, or even saving our bacon when the going gets seriously tough. How incredible that we can say that is possible!
And what amazing, powerful warrior women we are to get through such life changing experiences and bring forth little bundles of actual human life!
Now, hypnobirthing is often tightly associated with 'natural' births, but that is a complete misinterpretation of the term. Hypnobirthing is not about a pain-free labour. It is not about excluding any type of medical intervention at all costs. It is not about creating and sticking to a 'perfect' image of birthing that cannot be swayed from. We must remember that birth is often raw and primal. Birth can get incredibly messy and does not fit into a neat, tidy picture. It is not organised and there are no tick-lists that can be easily checked, no matter what plans we believe we have.
What hypnobirthing does teach is positivity. It teaches to accept the right birth on the right day for you. No matter how that birth occurs. No matter what path nature decides to take on that day. It teaches you to listen to your body and your baby, and respond accordingly. To go with the flow (even if it isn't your character - I am proof of that!) Not just during labour but in the weeks and months leading up to it. It teaches you to release all fear.
And that's the biggie. Release all fears. Why the hell do we have so much fear about something that should bring so much joy? Something that, no matter how it happens, should be celebrated. It is the most powerful, life-changing, life-affirming, epic thing we will ever do as women. So, let's stand up as a sisterhood, and be proud of our births! Screw the guilt and the anxiety and the disappointment. You deserve so much more for everything you went through and for the results you achieved. Instead of the horror stories, why don't we flood the conversations we have with our stories of pride, happiness, joy and strength, as we persevered and became the birthing superwomen we are
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